I had an overnight stay in the A&E of the John Radcliffe hospital in Oxford whilst writing this pamphlet. Through the night I watched a team of good enough nurses doing what they had to. What more could they have done to qualify as ideal nurses?

Maybe the current concept of the ideal as we see it in job adverts of all types creates a sense of something extra beyond the call of duty being required. Maybe this is marketing the professional to add the apparent status of a man's world to what women do in any case, and make no fuss about it

We're fortunate that Winnicot (1967) gave us 'the good enough mother'. This can rescue us from the hideous notion of the ideal. But it's so deep rooted in our individualistic culture that we have to work hard to give the good enough a chance to make a difference

And beware of those hell bent on perfection finding it nauseous, and scream at us for mentioning it.

Still in hospital three people asked what was I doing at Ruskin Hall and I referred to Debbie's thesis of ideal nurses and emotional labour. That's quite a earful to those who've not heard of it before.

A twenty five year old staff nurse didn't really want to know yet spoke of her mother always wanting her to be happy and have good table manners!

Yet sensing that stress connects to emotional labour she spoke of a medical student who dreads having to retake her finals. The student’s father, himself a medic, has high expectations (and the consequent fear of disappointment) for his daughter.

Two families, each with a daughter. Which do you buy?

Another respondent to my straw poll was thirty year old medic, probably a Slav struggling with her English, who cottoned on immediately as she spoke of others who strive to be ideal. Children, parents, lovers (that’s my bait) and maybe teachers. Or priests? but ‘they play at being god anyway’ she replied.

A consultant advised that if I find an ideal nurse I should marry her!

My not very scientific market research made my brief stay worth while. I had recovered from my overnight sickness and walked back to Ruskin Hall feeling wiser and much better.

One arid zone down and three to go

In my witch hunt for the tyrannical that rules the arid zones the ideal in nursing came first but in identifying others we see that each is irrational, demanding that victims try even harder to do what simply cannot be done, and without reference to the feelings involved.